Spiritual Uplift

Ok, so this might not have anything to do with religion, per say. But I thought that it was a beautiful article anyway! All on motherhood, and maybe a good view for those who aren't mothers as well...

"To The Mother With Only One Child"

My reactions was first "Wow. This applies to me as well, and I have two." It wasn't that long ago when I did only have one, and it was hard. It's hard with two too! I love it when she talks about how having one child was so heavy, and now having more is light. It's complete perspective that changes as life changes. But my most favorite part is when she says,

"You’re suffering now because you’re turning into a new woman, a woman who is never allowed to be alone.  For what?  Only so that you can become strong enough to be a woman who will be left." 

Love it. Hope you did too.

Why I Have Fallen Behind...Ugh

AM
6:00 "Ty, the dog is barking"
6:10 back asleep
7:00 shower
7:15 get Big T out of bed
7:16 change diaper
7:17 feed Big T breakfast
7:25 get Big T more breakfast
7:30 Dog needs breakfast
7:31 watch dog eat
7:36 take dog out
7:45 Bristol wakes up
7:46 Bristol goes potty
7:48 get Bristol breakfast
7:53 I eat breakfast
7:57 dog is barking again
8:00  change diaper
8:03 get ready
8:25 change poopy diaper
8:27  dog barking, actually has to go out
8:30 Bristol needs more milk
8:33 receive phone call
8:37 make Tytan bottle
8:43 put Big T down for nap

Well...you get my point eh? It's been a bit busy around here. Nothing new, it's always busy. But the added stress of the holidays, going out of town for six days, and having a sick puppy have just added to it. However, you are about to get a complete update on the last couple of weeks. I won't be falling any more behind!

I hope that you all had a wonderful Christmas!! And check back tomorrow!

 DINGLEHOPPER

aka

FORK

Sweet little Bristol got this wonderful idea from "The Little Mermaid."

SO, if you expect to eat with a fork at our house you might have to wait.

This whole episode of brushing her with a fork has really gotten me thinking about the influence that what our kids watch on TV really has an impact on what they do and how they act. This kid loved her princess movies. Not too bad, especially in limited doses. What do your kids watch on TV? Hope its good!

Aha!

A few "Aha" moments of late:

Tytan has never adjusted to the time change. He is up at 6:30. Oops! Never knew!

Puppies are just like newborns. They pee, poop, and sleep.

Bristol's sippy cups aren't working because the holes in the top have melted together in the dish washer. 

(Thanks Dad. Never would have thought of that myself!)

And my favorite: Nobody is perfect. Even those who I think have perfect lives/children don't.

I love "Aha" moments. They seem to ground me. It's like that really cold coke that you finally get your thirsty fingers wrapped around on a really hot hot day. Completely refreshing. They make me feel human again. Not that I don't often think or feel like Superwoman some days, but it's nice not to have the pressure of it all. 

For instance: Me and the kids were in our P.J.'s until 2PM today. 

Ya.

I know.

Terrible.

Hold on hold on....I wasn't feeling too great. So we had a sick party for mom. 

Bristol actually brushed my hair off of my forehead. 

Completely reminded me of her patting my back as I threw up with morning sickness when Tytan was just a peanut. She is so sweet. I think that I see a little mother personality blooming in her already.

Anyway, enough of my ramblings. Take a break for yourself today!

xoxoxoxo

Confessions, at last

The other night I was calming my sister's 2 month old baby down. She is TINY. Smaller than Big T ever was. I was looking into her little eyes and it hit me HARD that I want another one so bad. I started doing "the blink." They weren't tears of joy either. Why?

Bristol was born 5 weeks early. I was pre-eclamptic, and because Bristol was completely breached I had an emergency c-section. She was in the NICU for one week. read more here
Then Tytan came along. I was determined on having him naturally. Then after 11+ hours of "contractions", 3 epidurals, and an immense amount of pain (to keep it short) Dr. O. demanded another c-section...my uterus was rupturing. Dr. O. was right, 4 of the 5 layers of uterus was gone and Big T was 10 lbs, not 8. Oops! read more here


So, getting my kids here isn't that easy. I can do it right? Well...this is where my denial issues start to come in.

See, if it isn't bad enough having tough delivery and recoveries, I have "Undifferentiated Connective Tissue Disease" on top of it all. This is rheumatoid arthritis, lupus, etc. all squished into one thing. So basically my joints            
hurt.
There, I said it for the world to hear.

Let me explain. I was diagnosed at age 18 during my second semester of college. I was so mad, yet relieved that I could get relief from the pain. Arthritis runs in my family, so I wasn't too surprised. (On a side note...to all of you who witnessed a complete change physically, emotionally, and in my personality while a Freshman in college...SO SORRY. My meds required a lot of sleep which was hard to get, and they made me lose my hair, get sick when I ate, develop sores in my mouth and nose, and get tired really fast. Had I known they would do that to me...I may have just gone home until I adjusted. I really am sorry!) But,little did I know what the future held.

Dr.s have told me that a large family just isn't in my future. Ha! What do they know? Not much...I'm going to have 6 or 7. Heavenly Father will help me along the way.

So here are the issues:

1. Two c-sections means all c-sections from here on out. That's major surgery folks, and a little frame like mine can only handle so much of it.
2. A ruptured uterus means a long recovery, and careful examination after giving birth
3.UCTD means going off of my "heavenly" meds in order to have safe pregnancies
4. No meds means pain
5. Pain means joint deterioration
6. Joint deterioration means...well lets just stop there.

My goal is now 4. Just pray I get there k?

I'm not opposed to adoption. To be honest, I haven't given it that much thought. We will see what the future holds!

Now...don't think that I am in the depths of despair over this. I am content with who I am and the trials I'll go through in order to make it back upstairs. An even bigger blessing is that I have two healthy, and adorable children. I would go through it all over and over again to have them here with me. My Heavenly Father has a plan for me...it may not be my idea of a plan, but is it ever? And in this Season of Thanksgiving, I am so grateful to be here with the body that I have. What a blessing motherhood is, no matter how our children become ours. I love them more than anything!

Thanks for listening. If you read that all...you deserve a prize!

Your Questions, My Answers #1

Hey Steph! Love your idea and I'd love to ask a question that has been on my mind lately.  What I want to know is what factored into your decision to have your first child, what were your factors that you and Tyrell considered and prayed about? What stability do you think a relationship needs and what lifestyle do you think a couple needs to be ready for, for that huge jump? I know the timing different for everyone, but could you give me a little bit of commentary on what timing was like for you and what felt right and what didn't? You are en educated woman who lives the gospel and I'm really just needing some advice/commentary/discussion about this topic lately!


This is such a loaded question, and so many factors go in to deciding to become parents. With that said, I'll share with you my thoughts, which don't necessarily make them right for you. 


Why we waited 2 years: 
My Mr. and I knew that we wanted to be married for a little while before having children. We wanted to know how each other "worked." How we thought about things, handled hard situations, celebrated, how we expressed different parenting ideas etc. We thought that this was important before bringing a baby into our lives. I also knew that it would be too hard on me to have a baby while still in school. (We did cut it close, Bristol was born 3 months after I graduated college.) A lot of moms do have babies while in school, it is possible, but not for me!


When I (we) got baby hungry:
I think every couple does it. We are out in public and see a baby. The wife cries, and the husband wants to play with it. It started happening to us. We wanted one. This meant we wanted the one screaming her lungs out too. We wanted to scoop her up and make her feel better. Babies aren't all roses. But they sure are worth every second of it! We prayed and asked for guidance, we also went to the Temple. Since we believe that it is a commandment to "multiply and replenish" it was easy from there. We had the go ahead from our Heavenly Father. We were so excited. However, in giving advice, deciding when and how many children to have are very private decisions between husband and wife, and hopefully the Lord. These decisions should be prayed about, and when you receive your answer, act upon them with faith. 


Having kids is a huge jump in marriage. You can read every book, ask everyone for advice, but you still can't get completely prepared. You just don't quite know what it is like to have a baby until you do. You have to jump into it with both feet and have the faith that you will know what to do when challenges arise (a baby that hasn't pooped in 3 days) or know how to find out what to do. This is when moms, friends, and sisters advice come in handy!


TyRell and I also prepared our home. We wanted a home filled with love without bias. We wanted a clean home where the Spirit could dwell. And we wanted funds sufficient enough to pay for our children. We weren't rich by any means, but we were comfortable. Our children were expensive to get here, and we had an inkling that that they would be before they were born.


You also won't know quite what unconditional love is until you have a baby. Oh my the love that just makes your heart explode when that little bundle of joy is placed in your arms. You also won't know what being selfless is until you have a baby. A woman gives her body to the growth of a baby, and afterward gives every minute. This is not meant to sound demeaning. When I think of mothering, I think of Christ. It is such a Christlike act. It is beautiful and will make you grow so much! I can't quite think of the right words to describe it!


My heart goes out to those women who are or want to be mothers. It is such a divine calling. My prayers are with those who are preparing for parenthood. 


If you would like more insight on becoming parents, read this and this.

Bristol born March 16, 2009

Tytan born February 24, 2011

Please feel free to add more insight to mine...I could go on and on and on...but you don't want just my opinion! :)

I've been "Featured!"

You have probably seen this post,

but it was recently featured here!

Check it out! 

I'm pretty excited.

The Farmstead

Getting out with two kids isn't always easy. The "luggage" you have to pack around, the dirty diapers you have to change in public, and the public restrooms you have to take your 2 year old to. Not to mention hoping that they behave and have a good time. It can be exhausting! I've found that as long as I pack our bags the night before, and just relax and go with the flow, the kids are way better behaved and we all have a blast. 

That said...

We went to "The Farmstead" last weekend and had a blast! Cousin Jeffie and Hazel accompanied us with Aunt Katie. There was just too much to do, and I took way too many pictures. But here are some of my favorites! Enjoy!

Bristol riding Snow Ball

Hahaha, I just realized Jeffie's head is for the girl, and
Bristol the boy. Oops!

They had swings made out of tires, in the form of cows! Cute!

Riding the Cow Train. Thanks Ty for capturing the moment.

A couple of weeks ago my friend Diana asked me to write a post for her blog on Motherhood. I couldn't resist and sat down to do it that night. She just recently posted it to her blog, but I thought that I would share it with my readers as well! To read more, go here.

"Motherhood" is such a huge topic! I feel like I learn something new everyday, which is good I guess! I won't be the first to admit nor the last to deny that being a mom is hard. I think that the hard stuff changes with each phase of life too. Sometimes being a mom feels lonely, and we go unappreciated and unnoticed. However true this feels, it is so not true. Being a mom is such a wonderful gift, and a calling for us divine women from a Heavenly Father who knows we can do it! I love this quote,

"Motherhood is more than bearing children, though it is certainly that. It is the essence of who we are as women." Sheri Dew

Here is one of the first big "Aha" moments I had as a new mom. 

I was once in conversation with someone who is highly accomplished by the world's standards (which isn't bad...just sayin'). This person asked "So, do you work?" While holding my infant daughter I quickly replied sheepishly "No. I'm just a mom." That night I realized how wrong I was. I'm not just a mom. I am a MOM! Never again did I ever say that I'm just a mom. That small world adds great meaning to the idea, and not in a good way. Being a mom is hard work, and thus should be exclaimed with pride! 

I have also learned to always have a Plan B, C, D, etc. etc. Motherhood is not boring, and will always surprise you when you least expect it. I'm still learning not to sweat the small stuff, and that people staring at me while at the grocery store with screaming children are only staring because they were just there doing the same thing with their children, and had forgotten how hard it is! (At least that's what I tell myself;)) 

There is also no perfect mom. It may seem like it when we read magazines, blogs, or talk to other friends. I've learned not to compare my weaknesses with someone else's strengths. It just isn't fair, and leads to negative feelings. I do set goals and strive to be better, but it takes time! I take it one day at a time, and know that my children will love me, and are so quick to forgive! I have learned to lose myself in love, and that each day my heart grows more full. 

I love being a MOM!

Stephanie

Mother of Bristol 2 1/2, and Tytan 7 months

I'm so glad that we call it "Potty Training" and not "Potty Perfection."

Some days I feel like I didn't do any work in getting Bristol b potty trained. But then I have to remember that she is only 2. I'm 21 and holding, and I still have close calls. C'mon, don't deny that you don't do the potty dance every once in a while.

So of course I got it on the camera. Couldn't resist. Poor thing will probably get back at me for this one some day. Just living proof that we aren't perfect at our house!

P.S. I know...the hair. She insists on two braids. I try!

Picky Eater Solved

Bristol is a picky eater. It has been a battle for quite some time. You could probably agree with your kids, or kids you know. It just happens. I keep offering and offering different things, but it's always the same. 

Well, on a whim one day I created this:

Grilled cheese, strawberries, fish crackers

I know, maybe not the healthiest selection, but it's a start! Every day now Bristol asks for her "face lunch!" It makes me giggle inside.

Now on to happy and healthy eating!

Now if you want to get really fancy, check out the blog "Fun Food Fridays" on my side bar. She is insanely creative!

Cookies 'n Milk

I'm always taken back at how some of the most simple things create lasting memories. For example:

Tonight I called the family around the table for cookies and milk. We laughed and giggled, and ended up staying around the table for quite a while. I just took every second of it in...slowly. It was so much fun.

Then it hit me. I know why this is so much fun! Flash back to my younger years.

Dunking cookies (and not any cookies I might mention, Chips Ahoy) was serious business in my family. My dad had rules for the family event. I'll paint the scene.

The whole family, 6 girls, mom and dad, would sit around the table with our shallow glasses full of milk. We each also had a stack of cookies right next to us. A large box of Chips Ahoy! would be in the middle of the table for when we ran out. You would think we were about to play a serious game of ROOK or something, but no. Just dunking cookies. Here are the rules:

1. Don't dunk your first cookie in the milk until dad says "One, two, three dunk."
2. Don't let your cookie break while soaking


Penalty: NO MORE COOKIES!

I heard a mom once say "Feed your teenagers cookies, and you can get anything out of 'em."
Rang true in our family. Didn't matter what time of day or night, we would dunk. It was the best. This tradition even carried over into our family rafting trips on the Salmon River. If you have dunked with our family, you are a lucky few. Seriously!
Seems funny and a bit strange perhaps, but some great conversations came out of dunking cookies.
Hopefully we are on the right track!

BTW, rules don't count for the little ones! :) 

Even Big T enjoyed some cookie!

Bye Bye Binky, Bye

Sometimes being a mommy is hard. I'm not one to deny that every day time-outs, cleaning, fixing lunches, nap time struggles, and tantrums are easy. Tonight was no exception, and this was pure emotionally hard.

Tonight we said good bye to the bink. I think that it was harder for me than for Bristol B herself. She cried and wailed, asking for her bink back. But, I cried too.

In preparation, we (my Mr. and I) told her that last night was it, no more bink. Tonight we carried her outside. She had her favorite bink in her mouth, and her little fingers clutching more. Opening the lid to the garbage can she turned away. After being told to throw them in there, there was no hesitation. I was quite surprised! Not a second later and she was asking for them back.

I cried.

Bristol was born with a binky in her mouth It's no joke. So why now? It has been a long time coming. The pediatrician told me before she was three to throw it away. I know I know, she's not three. I would have gladly done it a year ago. The timing has just been so off! With moving, getting a new little brother, and moving again, I didn't want to make life harder. But now it's done.

Guilt.

I think I might feel pretty bad for a while. Poor little thing.

the aftermath

You Know You're a Parent When...

You Know You Are A Parent When

• You can fall asleep anywhere, doing anything...as pictured
• You find infant socks in between your sheets
• Your Mr. says to you "I'm going to put on my jammies."
• You forget to go to the bathroom
  

What are your funny moments?